- "When will you finally have kids?" This is something I get asked quite a bit. Sometimes it's people saying, "You better catch up to your sister." Or there is one friend that posts things on Facebook like "When are you guys going to get one of your own?" or "You guys need to get your own." When people ask questions or make comments like that, I try to take it as a compliment - meaning that they want me to be a parent and are excited for us to be parents. But then I think about how they have NO idea. I must admit that prior to us dealing with infertility, I'm sure I was guilty of asking people this question. But after going through all of this - trust me, I won't ask anyone that question anymore.
- "We always wanted to have a family." I don't really relate to this one or think anything of it if people refer to having kids as a family. I know we have lots of family that love us - but I think even in my post last night, I said something about enjoying our pre-family time. ;)
- "I only invited other parents." The good news here is that our family and close friends know how much we love kids. So we typically get invited to the kiddos birthday parties. We try to make the ones that we can and I enjoy taking lots of pictures to help capture the event.
- "Are you hung-over?" I don't really have anyone assume that I'm always hungover - which I guess is a good thing. :) But I do think sometimes there is a perception that having kids automatically makes you grow up and that us without kids haven't grown up yet.
- "You're so lucky you get to sleep in/shop/travel." This one I definitely hear quite a bit and depending on who says it to me, sometimes it does rub me the wrong way. I never quite understood why - but this article helped me realize why it sometimes bothers me. When people say it - it does kinda make me feel a little defensive like they're implyin that those of us without kids are lazy or self-absorbed or don't appreciate how we have more freedom to do whatever we want. Now, I don't think the people that say this are really intending it to come across that way. I think they are truly jealous of the free time and extra sleep I have that they used to get! So this one isn't really a big deal to me - but now at least I now I don't feel so weird for how those comments sometimes make me feel. Whew! ;)
- "This must be birth control for you." I think we used to get this one - but not really anymore. It wouldn't really bother me though. But the article's comments about it did crack me up.
- "Your dog/cat/parakeet is your baby." We do have a cat but most of our friends dislike her very much (poor Luna has trust issues) - so we don't really get comments like this very much.
- "I can't die; I'm a mom." Nobody has ever said this to me and I don't know that I would really argue with them. I am a daughter, sister, niece, cousin, wife, aunt, and friend though - which I think are pretty important titles as well. ;) It did remind me of an article I read about the earthquake in Japan back in March 2011. It was saying how employees that didn't have any spouses/kids were volunteering to be the ones working in the nuclear plants. Very selfless of them, but I'm sure their parents/siblings/relatives/friends weren't really thrilled with their sacrifice.
- "I'm sorry it's taken forever for me to call/email/text you." I don't really think this one is that big of a deal. I know everyone is busy, so I'm not offended if people take time getting back to me whether they have kids or not. With my busy schedule, I'm sure that I could probably argue that I am busier than some people with kids. ;)
- "You wouldn't understand." I can't really relate to this one. I don't think anyone really says this to us. If anything we get the "you wait and see when you are parents" type comments - which I think are fine to say. We know that parenting is tough and I'm sure we're not always going to see eye-to-eye on things. But we're up for the challenge! BRING IT ON!